As a teacher, I read the room many times throughout the school day. To read the room, I would pause, look around, listen and determine what was happening. If a child seemed to be out of sorts, I'd pull them aside to see what was going on, and if the whole class was a overly rambunctious or distracted, I would respond by changing the plans a bit to make time to focus the group in a positive way. This is a common daily event for all educators and parents too.
As a parent, I often took time to observe and consider my children's attitude, expectations, and feelings in moments of time, and respond accordingly always seeking as much positive peace and care as possible. People generally read the room of their lives often and make decisions in response. When reading the room of life, you may consider the following categories.
Reciprocity
The best relationships are reciprocal. When relationships lack reciprocity over a period of time, those relationships generally weaken. Optimal reciprocity includes showing interest in one another, contacting each other regularly, and reciprocal invitations. Of course, all relationships may enter periods where one person is more active with respect to the relationship to the other for many reasons, but in general, the best relationships are reciprocal.
Honesty
Patterns of dishonesty can truly harm a relationships. When what you hear doesn't match what you see regularly, reading the room will alert you to this kind of dishonesty. In general, honest relationships are the best.
Too much criticism
When relationships include too much critique and not enough empathy or care, those relationships will suffer. Too much judgement can crush a relationship.
Unhappiness
Sometimes when we read the room we may notice a great deal of unhappiness. This can be difficult especially if you don't have what a person needs to gain greater happiness and comfort in life. It's good to acknowledge the happiness in kind ways, and if you can bring some peace and happiness to the situation, that's positive.
Anger
Reading the room may make you aware of people's anger. Anger can be a frightening emotion to witness. When you experience people's anger, you have to make sure that you are safe, and when safe, if possible do what you can, if you can, to diffuse the anger.
Joy
Sometimes reading the room allows you to share in and experience great joy--those are wonderful times.
Fear or discomfort
At times we will notice people's fear or discomfort. If we can help in these situations, that's positive.
Slowing down life, reading the room, and acting accordingly helps us to live our best lives for ourselves and others.
