When rereading a post I wrote about my dad, I was reminded of the fact that my childhood church is celebrating a significant anniversary this year. That memory brought to life the role my childhood church, St. George's, played in my life--a valuable role.
I moved into the St. George's parish neighborhood when I was five years old. My parents who had always belonged to the Catholic religion in their respective parishes, St. Joseph's in Auburn and St. Stephen's in Worcester, joined St. George's as soon as we moved. That began my approximately 25-year tradition of attending mass every Sunday as well as attending mass and other services to mark the year's holy days.
As a young child and an avid people-watcher, I spent those Sundays and holy days listening to the words of the mass and watching all the people around me. Even as a young child I felt a deep devotion to the essence of my religion and the teachings of Jesus Christ. I especially loved the Easter rituals and remember well attending those services with my nana who lived across the street.
As a member of St. George's church, I started CCD (Confraternity of Christian Doctrine) classes in first grade. I remember vividly the first time I really thought about God, and that was during one of those classes. Our class at that time was held in the rectory's beautiful solarium. The teacher told us that God was everywhere, and at that moment sun was streaming into the room from all directions. I was amazed by that notion of God and have connected God to the sun ever since that day many decades ago.
Our CCD classes were held in the rectory, the church, and at a local Catholic high school, one I would attend later on. In second grade, I received my First Communion which was a very special celebration followed by a joyful family party. We also learned about confession then which was perplexing to me. The sins I reported to the priest regularly were usually the same including yelling at my mother, fighting with my siblings, and not doing household tasks. After the reports, I dutifully said the prayers the priest asked me to say to absolve myself of those sins. I wondered, at the time, who did all the sins the priests would discuss during their homilies, and it wasn't until my early adult years that I began to realize how rampant sins were.
My CCD teachers had a positive influence on me. I remember the lovely little Christmas stockings with candy in them that one teacher, Mrs. Tubridy, made for us. It was the first time someone outside of the family gave me a gift. I also remember the studies we had about the influence of cliques, and that was helpful as I moved into junior high school. My confirmation was a significant event too--I remember the spirituality of that celebration, a celebration I shared with so many friends.
In addition to CCD classes and regular masses, St. George's offered the community and me a wonderful social outlet. Each fall they hosted The Bayberry Fair which was a wonderful, festive community gathering comprised of all kinds of booths staffed by friendly neighbors that sold books, knitted goods, foods, raffle tickets, quality used items, toys, and more. My friends and I would spend the entire day at the fair. The finale raffle drawings were always the exciting culmination of the event.
My dad, mom, aunt, and uncle were active in the church community too. They served on a number of parish committees including the women's guild, parish council, electors, coffee shop crew, CCD teachers, choir, and more. Many of their close friends were church members, and they regularly socialized with those friends at dinner parties, backyard cookouts, and sing-a-longs. My family's involvement created a warm, nurturing group of adults around me, adults that I gained support from throughout my young life.
As a teenager, I was very active in the church's Catholic Youth Council (CYC). That activity provided me with leadership opportunities as well as many, many social experiences. At the time, we had a young priest, who was devoted to the parish youth. He had a lot of energy, and sadly some of that energy, I learned later on, was misdirected towards unwanted attention and interactions with some of the young women in our parish. That was never the case for me, and instead I found him to be a great source of support and fun. He fostered Sunday night movies in the parish hall, countless trips to sports events and concerts, and even overnight travel. Once he took the whole CYC to Montreal to see a Glen Campbell concert. We stayed in a great hotel, and had a lot of freedom on that trip. This young priest also opened up the rectory and the rectory resources to me when I was working on special school projects. That really helped me to achieve at school, and during a weekend retreat at a parish retreat center, he sent me a very special and encouraging note that also helped me to survive the angst of the teen years. Further he supported our parish folk group which performed at one his family member's weddings at a beautiful, historic restaurant and also presented a wonderful performance of Jesus Christ Superstar for the entire parish. There were the Sunday parish basketball games and the yearly cheerleading tournaments that engaged us in positive, weekly activities. I also volunteered at the church nursery every Sunday. I loved watching the little children when their parents attended mass. This was likely one step on the path to my future career as an educator. As I think about it, the church was a primary, positive center of support, guidance, enjoyment, and even career preparation for me throughout my years from age 5-18.
Upon entering college, I shifted most of my church-going activities to the campus of my Catholic college. Yet, I remember borrowing significant books from the church library upon returning home during breaks--those books introduced me to spiritual leaders and religious ideas that I still rely on today. And, when it came time to get married, my husband-to-be and I went through the church's marriage preparation classes which did highlight some significant issues to consider as we headed into marriage. We had a beautiful church wedding, and years later we had a wonderful 50th wedding anniversary mass for my parents at St. George's too.
After college, I became disenchanted with the Catholic Church for a number of reasons that I felt hindered my ability to live a good life. Those reasons mainly involved the church's actions related to abuse, intimacy, and the way the church treated women. I wanted and still want the Catholic Church to evolve in ways that fairly include women and better serve all within their ranks. When I think of the young priest who I liked so much, a priest who brought a lot of joy and light into my life, I wonder if his wayward ways could have been prevented with greater guidance from the leaders around him during his preparation and service. Did the silence the church showed abuse not only hurt those who were abused, but those who were ill-directed with regard to their relationships or inclinations. And, with regard to women, I wanted a greater role in the church--I didn't like the way women were second-class citizens in the church. And, I felt that the way the church treated relationships was outdated and too restrictive.
Now at this late age, I remain grateful to the wonderful support and community St. George's offered me overall. I return often to celebrate the lives of neighbors, relatives, and friends who have died and have their funerals at the church. If I lived in my home neighborhood again, it's likely that I would join the church even though I don't agree with all that it has done or does now. As my dad would often say, churches are human-made and just like humans, they are not perfect.
The rich spiritual base I received from St. George's and my attendance at a Catholic high school and college has served me well over time with regard to living a value-driven life. I am thankful for the rich community St. George's offered me. I hope in time, the church will broaden its ability to serve in honest, humane, loving ways. Onward.
