I thought about my relationships with many people this morning and as I thought about this, I realized that kindness and care differ from person to person. For some, they enjoy frequent contact and for others, they appear to enjoy contact less frequently. The frequency of contact is one element of kindness and care. Some enjoy utter honesty even when it's uncomfortable and then there are some that don't want to share too much--they're more private in nature. There are those that will sit and talk for hours, and others who rarely want to simply chat, but prefer active shared endeavor instead. For every relationship, there's a somewhat different recipe of what works and what doesn't. As a friend and family member, I want to be aware of what my loved ones desire for our relationship--I want to be there for them when I have what they need, and recognize when a need is beyond my capacity or a desire is out of their reach or interest.
As I think more on this topic, I am thinking of the many areas of care and kindness that can be part of that relationship mix, areas such as this:
- frequency of contact
- kind of contact - letters, meet-ups, texts, emails, video chats, phone calls, vacations. . . .
- shared events - walk and talks, talks, dinners/lunches, adventures. . .
- honesty quotient from share everything to discerning share
- types of celebrations
- more personal or more inclusive events - lots of people or very few people
- outdoors or indoors
- my home, their home, no one's home
- projects or no projects
- flexible or less flexible
- less talk or more talk
