When unexpected events occur, you have to adapt with as much positivity as possible. As I deal with my loved one's medical challenges, I realize that I have to adapt. I've consulted with many to gain some perspective. This is probably the toughest life challenge I've had to date since what I desire in the situation is likely impossible, and what is happening is quite depressing.
So what to do?
First, I have to work with the reality that exists. A reality that includes what we need to survive and live as well as possible. I'll create a routine of care and stick to it.
Next, I'll think about my ideals for this situation and continue to lean in that direction with hopes that some of those ideals can be met in time. The ideals include best possible care. The question that remains is what is possible? In a murky situation, that's not clear.
Since I'm not the decision maker in the situation, I have to surrender. Some have encouraged me to try to become the decision maker, but consult with many and deep thinking myself do not point me in that direction since the short term gain is very, very small while the long term harm is great.
Looking back at life, I realize that my mom and aunts faced situations similar to this one. I was not too involved at the time, but was somewhat dissatisfied with their decisions. Clearly, like me now, they did not have a lot of options back then, and there are still not many options today. I'd like to see change in this arena of care since what's happening now and what happened back then is quite dismal.
Onward.
