One successful way to deal with a tough situation is to take the long view. During the first months of COVID, I retired from teaching. To make that decision I took the long view, and the long view related to my health, retirement, and current obligations pointed me in the direction of retirement. Even though an earlier-than-planned retirement resulted in a financial loss, I have not regretted that decision--it was the right decision. The money lost was a small price to pay for a choice that translated to good living.
Now I'm dealing with another tough situation, and I will once again take the long view to make decisions. Essentially in this regard, the decision relates to what I can live with as my life goes on. I don't like to live with regrets and that's one reason why I think deeply about most decisions. So as I think of the long view, these questions will lead me.
- Am I using my capacity in this situation in ways that will positively affect my life and the lives of my loved ones going forward. My answer to this is yes. If I were to just go along with what some see as acceptable in the situation, I would simply be supporting what I feel are harmful, hurtful patterns of behavior that have been in place for a long time, perhaps generations.
- Am I willing to accept the losses related to my choices? While I wish there were no losses, I know that there are potential losses. I've offered a number of olive leaves to prevent losses, and so far there's been no desire to work with me for peaceful resolve. This demonstrates to me that there will likely be losses no matter what I do. So, the question becomes, Am I willing to accept some losses over others? I am not willing to accept losses related to self respect, personal health, and the ability to love and care for my immediate family. I am willing to accept losses related to relationships that don't support me in any way and relationships that are abusive and hurtful--while I prefer positive change in those situations, so far that has not been possible.
- Will I continue to do what I can to live my best life for myself and others? Yes, I will. I'll continue to consider my choices with regard to my values, service to others, good living, and moral/truthful directions, I'll also respect myself and work with loved ones to make the best possible decisions and live the best possible life.
